Enuf is enough

"No women can take a man from you, unless he is willing to leave."

True.

but it breaks my heart to admit it.

I was hoping that if I didn't say it out loud, 

then all of these wouldn't be true.

but I'm loosing faith.

I'm loosing sanity.

I'm loosing 'me'.

I can't do this anymore.

I'm tired of living in denials.

I'm tired of running away.

I'm tired of faking smiles.

I'm tired of pretending to be okay.

I'm tired of telling my heart that everything will be fine.

I'm tired of reminding myself to never loose hope.
every single second! again and again!!

these needs to meet an end.

cause I need some rest.

as my wounds really needs to be healed.

"Every test God gave you is custom made.

specifically made for you.

and every test is designed to make you stronger.

coz He knows your weakness,

and He knows your capabilities.

every test is to improve your weakness,

but never was made beyond your capabilities."

so this time,

let's just cut out all the running and faking parts.
acting like nothing happened is not gonna cover the fact that it actually happens.
so face it and deal with it.

no more 'marathons'.

no more 'dramas'.

 He gave you His words,

he promised you that you'll be fine.
he promised you that you 'kompem' boley get thru dis.

so stop holding back your feelings just because ur scared.

why bother being scared of loosing,

when you know it's not even worth of keeping?

it's time for you to let go of everything,

and never ever look back to what's in the past.

from now on,
let's just face the truth and slowly deal with it.
there was never anyone guilty enough to be blamed.
everyone was just playing their role as instructed by Him.

semua ini ketentuan Allah s.w.t,
walaupun sesetengah kejadian tu rasa tak masuk dek akal pun ada,
tapi terimalah setiap ujian Dia dengan hati yang tabah dan redha.
kerana setiap yang terjadi itu ada hikmah yang nyata di sebaliknya.

"semoga Allah berkati kamu."

I started running, tho I knew that there is nowhere to run to. I'm an idiot. I know!!